Yom Kippur Thoughts

Happy new year, everyone. I hope all my readers who celebrate Yom Kippur had an easy and meaningful fast, and that you were all "inscribed in the book of life."

Here's a peek into my holiday:

Charitable thoughts that crossed my mind during Yom Kippur:

It's Yom Kippur, and I'm in Jerusalem! And I live here! I am the luckiest person in the world!

My rabbi is really funny and very inspiring. He said just the right things during his speeches. We'll keep him.

I'm so happy that I go to a synagogue where women who wear pants and married women who do not cover their hair feel comfortable coming, because everyone is seriously welcome here.

Wow. Hundreds of people in white, flowy garments. That looks really cool.

There are a lot of very cute little children in my synagogue. They are so adorable.

I just love that all the streets in Israel are closed to traffic on Yom Kippur, and that everyone, regardless of religious affiliation, is out taking walks or riding their bicycles on the otherwise empty streets. What a special day. I know it's no fun for the people who are very secular and would prefer to be able to drive, but from my perspective it's a wonderful thing.

I love the parts in the prayer services for Yom Kippur when we get down on our knees to bow. Especially when we kneel all the way over with our faces on the floor. Besides being a good chance to stretch, it feels really holy and . . . supplicative. One feels truly like a servant of God when one is on the floor proclaiming His glory. Plus I love envisioning the way the Jews did it in the Holy Temple thousands of years ago, as described in the service. Knowing that we are praying just as they did makes me feel a deep connection to my ancestors.

Uncharitable thoughts that crossed my mind during Yom Kippur:

If those kids just outside the sanctuary don't keep the noise down, I'll have to kill somebody.

There is no doubt that one of those kids on the bicycles is going to run someone over, probably me, because they are so not watching where they are going. I may have to kill somebody.

That man and woman over there . . . are they a couple? . . . My God, they sure look like they might be a couple . . . and that would make total sense because . . . they are two of the most annoying people I know! They are perfect for each other! I can't believe I didn't think to set them up myself!

Can someone please invent a good tune for "v'chol hama'aminim"? One that doesn't put me to sleep after three verses?